Sunday, September 28, 2008
Thunderbirds are GO!
Wow, what a week. Once things started happening, they kept happening!
The news. We have an egg donor. Dr S put us in touch with a wonderful woman named Tertia, who runs a surrogacy and egg donation agency in South Africa. You can find her at www.nurture.co.za. We will be the first couple to fly an egg donor from SA to India. As you can imagine, the logistics of all this is one mean feat. But Tertia, Dr S and I are all high-achieving go-getters who don't consider the possibility of failure and don't take no for an answer.
We chose a lovely donor who is tall, blonde, blue-eyed and smart. Can you believe she is an electrical engineer like my hubby. The best part is that she really wants to help us create a family and is very excited about being able to do so. She is willing to put her life on hold for a bit and travel to India just for us! Believe me, she's not in it for the money, which I think is a little light on, but we can redress that with pressies for her (we don't have to, we want to).
Tertia has hooked up with an IVF clinic in South Africa (Cape Town) and the RE there is doing all the testing and monitoring. He is in touch with Dr S and Dr Y, who are setting the medical protocol - hopefully this week. On October 13 our ED undergoes her physicals, but the blood workup will be done prior to that.
So, here we have an egg donor from South Africa, a surrogate in India and a couple in Australia making a family. Wow. It is such an honour to be the instigator of this process and make friends with people from across the world, who only have our best interests at heart. I must say, after almost going to the USA for surrogacy, this is a really easy, quick and humbling experience. When I cancelled the IVF clinic in Houston, they were very pissed off at me and one person there sent a snipey email to my surrogate questioning my integrity. Miss A put her in her place very quickly.
I still have not heard back from the lawyer to whom I sent $3000USD for contracts. I know she has done some work on the contracts, but her initial fees statement sais if we cancelled at any time prior to the execution of the contract, she charges $175 per hour, which will be deducted from any fees sent.
I have sent two emails asking her for a statement of costs, and asking for a return of part of the $3000. It has been two weeks and not a peep. How disgraceful. Funny how these "professionals" are all over you like a rash, then once they secure your business and money, they disappear. I will continue to ask for a part refund, and if I don't hear from her in the next week or so, I will start making noise about reporting her to the law society in the state where she practises.
That aside, Bob thinks we just put the $3000 down to a lesson learned. I don't care so much about the refund of fees, as I do about her living up to her end of the bargain and behaving professionally, legally and responsibly. I have discovered that everyone (except miss A) I have dealt with through the whole USA surrogacy saga is not really in it to help you, rather to line their own pockets. I am so glad we are bypassing American businesses completely in our journey to become parents through surrogacy, though I still grieve not working with Miss A.
Posted by Phoenix at 10:10 AM