Wednesday, October 29, 2008

I am quite ... okay ... ish

When one writes a blog about surrogacy, there is so much that happens behind the scenes that one never reports to their beloved friends in Blogland. So this is just a shortened version of the past days anxieties.

Now, keep in mind, I have deferred from uni this semester, have no job ... no point in getting one because we will be travelling soon, so I am basically stuck at home ... cleaning, gardening, cooking and checking my email every couple of hours. Sometimes i want to write in my blog and fess up - everything - how I feel, what has been said ... in emails, how many emails passed between me and the docs, me and the agency, me and my email surro friends, me and my doc here in Australia. Add to that the research I do. I love google. But sometimes too much information gleaned from the internet is a bad thing. To save you the long and sordid details ... this is the sanitised update.

There is this thing called an AMH test. That is an acronym for Anti-Mullerian Hormone test. I have never heard of this test until recently. As you all know there was some confusion about the results of the FSH and LH of my dear donor from SA. Panic stations ... an eight day wait for the results of this new you-beaut test, which is, apparently, the standard test in South Africa for detecting ovarian function.The FSH tests were very poor for my 29yo donor. However, it appears that this is because the tests were done on CD 14, when they should have been done on CD2-3 ... while the donor is not on the pill.

After much researching, comcern, far I had chosen a dud ED ... and complete inability to trust our ED agency and the doctor in SA ... the AMH test is ordered. What an amazing and wonderful donor - she has the test the day after it is ordered ... so begins the eight-day wait, while I am being told by all and sundry to stop worrying.

In the meantime, I am searching for back-up plan B ... as we do. Can i cycle a second donor at the ame time .. just in case. Can I cycle myself (dumb idea)? Can I get an Indian ED

So I wait ... and wait ... I am so good I do not even email our ED agent. And when I do (on day 8) she faithfully gets the hurry-up on the results. They are fine. Yay - let's move ahead.

Can I just accept the results are? No. Can I trust anyone, without having to ask more questions and delve into the intricacies of hormonal test results? No. I get a number. I didn't need a number. I just needed to trust our agent and the doctor in SA that when they say "fine" it is all fine. But I extracted the number from porr Tertia anyway. (Believe me, thiswoman is a saint for putting up with my shit). I get the magic number. 7.88. Yeehah. Sounds like a good solid number: but what does it mean? Like really, 7.88 is nothing if the normal range starts at 15. You guessed it ... I sold my soul to Google for AMH for an indication what a 7.88 result means. And what did i find? Bad news ... of course. I am such an armchair doctor.

According to my mate Google, a 7.88 puts a woman in the LOW FERTILITY RANGE of 2-15. OMG ... O My F..ing GOD (I am crossig myself here). My donor is a DUD! I chose the only donor in the whole of SA who is a dud. I suffer a cruel blow. Furstly, I have chosen a donor who is in the low ferility range. Secondly, I've come to really like and appreciate and feel very very grateful to this donor .. and I am also concerned that she has infertility problems. i have to admit here and now, I am more concerned for myslef and our surrogacy plans, but i am not such an arsehole that I am not concerned that this porr girl, who has offered to donate her family genetics to a couple of strangers ie me and Bob, and not just for a few bucks (they don't get paid much under SA laws), this girl is doing it because she wants to help US. Woah.

So, I jump and down and send emails flying. How can you say she is fine/ I collect every AMh test result I can find on the internet. There is not much information. This is not a test that is routinely performed in Australia, and not so much in the USA or UK ... all I find is posts to ferility groups where women have had the AMh test doen and recived poor reults. However, they don't actaully post the NUMBER. NAd I want a FREAKINg number!!!

What do I do?

I ended up calling my dear Dr T here in Australia, the stodgy old bugger that he is (and he's not even old, rather, dignified to point of restraint, but oh so very knowledgeable being the top dood of one of the two main fertility clincis here in Perth, Australia).

So I phone Dr T and his gorgeousg receptionist Miss O - she of the stable, safe , comforting Irish lilting accent is delighted to hear from me She knows we are doing surrogacy. She is very excited to hear the outcome. She knows who we are! And she hears my trembling voice and gets Dr T on the phone - immediately.

I am not Dr T's only patient ... but I am probably his most bothersome one. He egts on the phone and i blurt ... bal bla bal ...FSH/LH ... .9 and .7 ... CD14 ... on pil ... bal bla bal. AMH test .. 7.88 ... bla bla bla ... low fertility range.

And he very clamly tells me that different countries have different paramenters they gauge test results by.. he urges me to ask the doctor in SA what the reference ranges for the AMH test are from the lab they used. He tells me that yes, a 7.88 is not fabulous result according to Australian and US ranges, but SA could be completely different. Cool. I breathe a sigh of (momentary) relief. I get straight off the phone and shoot yet another urgent email to the docs in India, to poor Tertia at our ED agency, and directly to the doc in SA.

Honeslty, within an hour I have the SA results. Anything above a 2 is good according to the SA reference ranges. Yaaaaa - freaking ... hooo. Not only is my donor looking super good, she is looking super incedibly good ... she is the heroine of the egg donation ... and I am SO PROUD OF HER! And feeling like a big fat dickhead myself.

So that's our update. We plan to send some $ to SA this week to pay for travel and accommodation and a few medical tests. Honestly, after the US surrogacy/global financial meltdown crisis, I am so not at all concerned about finances. That is one area we don't have to nit-pick about. We have an unexpected insurance bill of $1500US ($2400AUD). Do I care ... nope, not a bit. I do care about ensuring our donor is protected in case the most horrible of things happen ... God forbid ...

1 comment:

Jaymee said...

don't ever feel guilty for hounding people to death, i do it all the time. i actually acousted my dr in the grocery store the other day and melted her ice cream because i would not shut up. you are stressed and scared, asking questions is your way of coping and that is okay.

i am so happy that things went okay. i cannot imagine trying to coordinate what you are managing. i am having trouble with getting people in the same country organized. be more patient with yourself.